First Kiss....

I know it's been a long time since I've last posted. I've passed Grade I ballet, gotten a cell phone (with unlimited texting!), made a coupe of new friends (love ya Erica! Mike you're a wacko!), and gotten strait A's and A+'s. But the most important one yet? My first kiss. I know...I've been dreaming about it for months. It happened on Sunday, Novenmber 16, 2008. Colin...I was so happy. It was unreal. But reality slapped me on the face, just to wake me up, again. Today, another weird date, I kissed him. Unreal, still. But it happened. And weather or not I believe it, we kissed.

A Wonderful Night

Ok, I know: I haven't posted in a long, long time. I've been really busy...Anyway, last night was my block party. I was invited to Colin's, so I invited him to mine. I invited all of my girlfriends, but they were busy. So it was just Colin and me. And all of the other girls (Jessie, Noah, Sarah) who either lived on my street, or was invited. I made Colin do our traditional whip cream-and-bubblegum game, which was so much fun. Noah smashed the whip cream in my face (in front of Colin) and I chased her and Jessie down the street. Although it should have been embarrassing, it was really fun. I didn't care that Colin was watching us, and I had whip cream everywhere. It was just fun.
Then we did a water balloon toss. Colin was my partner, and we made it pretty far. Especially because I dropped it once, and it didn't pop. But then he threw it, and I caught it a bit to tight. It popped all over me. But once again, even though I'm standing by Colin and I'm soaking wet, it was fun!! Then we played capture the flag, which wasn't that special (the other team cheated) and ate pizza. It was what was after dinner that was fun(ny).
Colin and I were talking about the last day of school, when Anna and Clare dared us to either kiss, or say if we wanted to. Then Emily and Archer come out with fully-loaded water guns. And they start squirting me. Colin and I got up and ran, and they started shooting him. Then like 4 other kids came out with water guns, and started shooting us. First of, what do they have against me?!? Second of, What do they have against Colin?!? They don't even know him! Actually, he said that: "What do they have against me? I don't even know them!". So we ran for a while, just up and down the street. He stopped running, just so kids could squirt him, while I hid behind a tree from a fully-loaded Jessie. Then, Noah pured a glass of water on me, and I screamed and chased her around the street, and commanded the kids to shoot her. And they did! By now, Colin's at my side, giving me another hug (we did that a lot. He hugged me more than he ever has)and laughing (which is pretty rare) right alongside me. Again, I'm soaping wet, but I don't care that Colin's with me. I think that it was more fun for me that he saw me like this; being myself, openly. I went in to get a change of clothes, and an umbrella. Jessie, Colin and I hid behind the umbrella from the squirts for a while. I was nestled up against Colin, but not just because the umbrella was small... :) Soon it got dark out, so Jessie, Sarah, Noah, Colin and I went and sat on my yard. Noah threw a pixie stick on my head, and Colin started laughing. Now remember that he doesn't laugh or smile a lot. But today, he was smiling a ton, and laughing too. So there he is, laughing at me. I pushed him over and called him a jerk (remember the nicknames?). Then I took his hat. He started chasing me around the yard, but for some reason I outran him for a while. Finally, he wrapped his arms around me, into a tight hug, and tried to get the hat back. The whole thing was the most boyfriendish-girlfriendish thing we've ever done. Well, he got his hat back. Only for it to be stolen again by me multiple times after that. When Sarah and Noah went home, Colin, Jessie and I went to Jessie's backyard. Colin and I were playing a bad game of volleyball with a big tennis ball. I grabbed his hat when he was laughing at me, and he chased me around the yard. He forced me into another tight hug, leaned in, and kissed me on the cheek. I smiled, pulled back, and threw his hat into the air. Not much happened after that. We played Rock Band with Jessie (I had to sing because I lost a bet on Carnival Games). We tried to make Colin sing, but after two lines, we made him stop. So we went to Jessie's house. Jessie started playing the piano, so Colin and I tried. We were playing Contradance together. We talked about the clarinet and the trumpet until my mom called to say that Colin's dad was there. We walked back to my house with Jessie, hand in hand. Colin's dad stayed for a while, so we sat on the grass and talked, I stole his hat again (for like the 10th time) and hugged. His dad said it was time to go 20 minutes later, thus concluding a wonderful night. And what a wonderful way to end a wonderful night like another kiss from your boyfriend.

A Picture

He came to my fourth of July party. That was so much fun. His whole family came, along with my other friends and their families. Anyway, my friend's mom got a picture of us together and sent it to my mom. I put it in my files, then looked at it close up. He doesn't smile often, which, now that I think about it, sorta disturbs me. Not much at all, but a bit. He smiles when he's around me, but not much after that. He laughs and smiles then, but other than that he stands and "looks tough" sorta. Not really, but in a way, right? So as I was saying, I was checking the picture (he was half smiling, by the way) when I looked at his eyes (through his glasses). A shiver went up my body. It's like when you look at your crush and they look back and you get flustered. Except I was looking at a pic of him. I melted. I had to close the window. It exhilarates me, like adrenaline almost. Yet better.

Talking

I like him. A lot. And he knows it, too. I also know that he likes me back. Just as much. I think. Anyway, he likes me a lot, too. Which pleases me. I no longer have to hide it. YAY. Course, I haven't for a while. But oh well. The only problem is that I can't talk to him. Well, I can. Quite easily, too. But only when we're face to face. On the phone, I freak. At night, I plan what I'll say to him if he calls (which he doesn't do often).I think that he has the same problem. That or he waits for me to talk first. I don't get it. Ugh. Boys are soooo confusing.

His Good Side...

At camp, I've been told by boys that have been with Colin for a while that he has seemed to have gotten aggressive. Which I support. He is pretty mean and violent. Not all the time. Heck no! But every now and then...he gets ugly. I don't like it either. They think that he's trying to impress me. I understand because I guess he got rather mean right after we started dating. They said that he used to be really cool. Like last year and earlier this year. I didn't know what they were talking about. I always think that he's cool. But tonight, I saw his "cool" side. He was casual, seemed comfortable, and very at ease with his brothers. He was so funny, cool, and confident in a way. Every time that we had a staring compotition, I could tell that he like looking into my eyes. As I liked looking into his. I finally got to see his "Cool Colin" side. Which only makes it harder to put him down with many complaints of his meansness. I have to meet him tomorrow. Please.

Today

Obviously, my friend stayed true to her word and actually had this "party". At 3:45, I cam over to my friend's house to help "prepare". At 4 on the button, Alex came over to join the partay. About 2 minutes later, when Anna was preparing to squirt Colin with a gun, Colin joined us and scared Anna out of her mind. She wasn't expecting him to come so soon, and hadn't finished getting the water gun ready. Olivia arrived shortly after, and the party really started. We were having a great time, till Anna announced that Clare was going to join us. Everyone loves Clare (me included), except Colin. Can't blame him. She can be a bit of a pest (as in endless teasing). He doesn't hate her, but doesn't like her that much. And vice versa. We had a great time together, though. It was a ton of fun. The best part? Clare got stuck in a kiddy swing, and while I went to the back to call my mom, something happened. Nothing big; trust me. I overheard while I was on the phone Alex saying "Ellie's gonna kill you, Clare". What could Clare have possibly done to Colin while she was stuck in a kiddy swing? It turns out that Clare had kicked him a place "where the sun don't shine" as Clare put it. Colin "didn't care", but I hugged him anyway. Normal, I've been hugging him the entire time. But for some reason, I was compelled to do something. I turned my head, and my lips brushed his ear (accidental; trust me) and didn't stop moving until they reached his cheek. And there, I kissed him. I couldn't believe myself. I just kissed a boy for the first time in my life. And no one even noticed.

A Long Time...

It feels like it's been weeks since I've seen Colin. It's been days. 5 days. I think that I'm losing those wonderful memories of my fling for him. A kiss, hugs, holding hands... We really liked each other. I know that I still like him, and he likes me. But I wnat to remember what it feels like when he looks at me, when he smiles at me, when he hugs me... thankfuly, my friend is supposed to have a get-together with him and a few others at her house tomorrow. Yay! i hust hope that she actually does. If not, there's going to be a cast and crew party in a week for the big play that we were both in. I miss him. And others. But mostly him...

What Happened

Do you remember in one of my posts, Wants and Observations, when I said that I had three wants? I decided to realize what has happened to those wants. My first want was for Colin to like me as much as I like him. Well, I don't know if he likes me as much as I like him; he might like me more! He really likes me, and I can tell: "If you hit me, I would cry" even though no one's hits hurt him, "I would never hurt you", "I promise that I won't do it to you" which was said when he was zapping everyone with his new shocker pen. You get the point. So want number one? Acomplished. My second want was for him to chose me over Mary. Well, as you will soon see, that definatly happened. Although my friend thinks that Mary and her friend both have crushes on Colin. Grrr. And my last want? To kiss him. Well, that didn't come ture. But he did kiss me! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!?! We went to lunch and my annoying friends nagged him to kiss me. They were really annoying, and made Colin and I really embaressed by playing Truth or Dare. We both chose truth and one of my friends asked him if he wanted to kiss me. Colin nodded. I turned red. Then she asked me if I wanted to kiss him. I nodded and he turned red. Then I hugged him, because I felt bad. I wispered to him "You could have kissed me then. No one would have noticed". He smiled. A few minutes later, I hugged him again, but this time his lips brushed my cheek and stopped there for a few seconds. I smiled as all of my friends went "awww". I was so happy. It still doesn't seem real. So third want? Done, and happy about it.

My BFF's Hook-up

My friend, Olivia, is very supportive of my realationship. Well, not who I chose as a boyfriend; he gets on her nerves sometimes. But I remember her riding me about going out with him at the begining of the school year. Today, she got a bit of what I call a taste of her own medicine. Durring lunch and before it, my teacher (who helped Colin ask me out; well, by nagging him. She likes him,and thinks that he's a good match for me) decided that this guy from another teacher's class (who I think is just a perfect boy: smart, funny, sorta cute. Ahhh... FRIEND MATERIAL FOR ME. Don't worry) would be a good match for Olivia. So Colin hooked them up. Olivia's still getting over it; so's Andrew, the guy...

The Play

I really like him. I know I do. We hold hands, hug and stuff (NO, not kissing. blah) all the time in public. I love it; and so does he. He's the star in our Drama Club play which is Willy Wonka Jr. He plays Charlie Bucket, and he's totally tone-deaf. None of us (including him) know how he got the part. Either way, it's sorta hard to remain loyal to him when everyone around you is making fun of him. I feel so bad for him, and I'm proud that I don't make fun of him. I'm proud to have him as my boyfriend, tone-deaf or not. The best part about the play is that we've done a total of 6 performances, counting tonight. He plays the cool-factor, but I know that he's sorta scared deep down. So what does his loyal, supportive, encouraging girlfriend do before every show? I start by holding his hand when we're waiting for places, then give him a good-luck hug before he goes on stage; no matter what anyone says, he's the bravest, greatest person in the world to me, and he deserves o know that. Or at least interpret it.

My New Boyfriend

As you can tell by the title, I have a new boyfriend. No, it's not some one other than Colin. It means that our study date went well; very well. Ever since he admitted that he liked me, confirmed that we were going out and I admitted that I liked him, we've been really happy together. Sure, no dates together, but at school he continues to walk me to all of my classes, most of the time we go to recess together, and we are close and getting closer. We hug a lot, and just today, we held hands. For a while. I really like him, and he obviosly really likes me. I have his cell number memorized and he knows my number, too. We promised each other that we would stay in touch over the summer, since it starts for us next Thursday. I think that I'll invite him over for our 4 of July party. Wouldn't that be romantic? The two of us, sitting next to each other, watching that fireworks...the only problem with that is there are also a bunch of other guy friends (well, technicly, Colin's not just a friend) which, at least one of them I know gets jealous easily. Yikes. Oh well, gotta tell or show them sooner or later. Might as well do it then. Provided that he comes...there's another thing that I think he would like to do with me. There's a new movie coming out called Journey to the Center of the Earth in 3-D. It looks sorta scary for me to see alone just with my parents. I bet he likes action movies anyway, and I would love to see it with him...I decided that I will get him a birthday present. Something small, and he's going to be at camp all day anyway, so I'll stop by and leave it on his doorstep. I hope that he'll like it...he probably will love that I thought about him and remembered his birthday anyway. He'll love it, no matter what it is. Right?

Study Session

I refuse to call it a date. Really. Colin and I had a study SESSION on Saturday, because I needed help on my math homework. Well, that's what I said. I think that I just needed to acctualy work on it to get it. Oh well. That was my excuse. Didn't fool anyone. It was worth a shot. Either way, we talked the entire hour and a half. It was really nice. And I found some things out. Mostly useless stuff, but two great tidbits: 1. We are going out, and he liked it that way. Me too. And 2. He likes me. The same way that I like him. Dream come true, right? Well... I am super confused. HAPPY: don't get me wrong. But I am seriously hard-core thinking about how and why I like him. And if I mean it. I would rather not break a heart. Not that I would. I am 99.999% positive that I like him the way that I always have. When he hugs me (half or not), it's the warmest and most conforting hand that I have ever felt. Even when he looks at me, he keeps me in his grasp. I always smile. So don't missinterperat me: I think that everything is a dream. Too good to be true.

Signs

Ok, I really hope that Colin likes me. I have from the start. But now I'm getting signs. Good signs;don't worry. I love it. He's giving me signs like looking at me in ELA. And smiling at me. It makes my heart flutter every time. He sits next to me in my math class. The best part: I can hug him. Not big time. But half hugs. Like put your arm around his shoulder, and he puts his arm around yours. He's the main character in our drama club play. I am working backstage with others, and our last rehersal, he was waiting backstage. He had just gotten off and was standing with others. As I walkied by, I told him, "Nice job". He was taken aback, but grasped what I had said by the time that I started walking away, father backstage. He turned to me and said, "Thanks". I smiled, and continued walking away, when he turned around again and said, "Really". Now, I must admit, he's not that great of a singer. But he tries, and I can see it in his eyes. He's a good actor, though, no matter how hard he tries. I guess not many people tell him that. But he seemed to really like it when I said it. And I really ment it.

Back from Camp!

So sorry that I haven't posted recently (although it's not like anyone's reading it...). I was once again busy. For the past few days I was camping (it was a total blast!). The best part was that I was with you-know-who the entire time! Well, not sleeping but you get the picture. I have to go now, but I will be back on soon to tell about it.

Wants and Observations

Naturaly, for me there are many wants in life. 1. Colin has a crush on me as big as mine for him. 2. He doesn't trump Mary over me. And number three? 3. To kiss him. NOW BWFORE YOU MAKE JUDGMENTS: I'm not a romantic airhead. And I don't want my dream kiss to be a big romantic one. I want it to be my first. Light, dainty, yet a twinge of romance and lust. I want it to be with Colin. Under one condition: he has to like me the same way I like him. That's my first prioority. My second is for him to hug me. Then comes the first kiss. Ahhhh... Anyway, hehe. That's my list of wants. From him at least.
Observations... Where to start? I think that we should start in ELA class. It's the last period of the day. I tend to let Colin sit down first, so I can see 1. where he's facing and 2. where I will be able to see him. Now I don't get to chose my table. Neither does Colin. That's why I let him sit first: so I can figure out which seat at my table is best to sit in to see him. Then we start. I'm getting hints from Colin that he likes me as much as I like him because we flirt. Even when his back is to me, like it was today. Colin kept looking back at me. And not for a second, either. No. Even when I wasn't looking, I could see him (perifeal vision). Colin stared at me. Then we begin. Every now and then, casualy, I look back at him. We look at each other not for very long. We get embarressed. But before he looks away (I'm usualy the one who looks away first. Sometimes he contimues to look at me after I look away), I shoot him my great smile. Talk about flirty! Then I look down quickly. But he catches it.

Jealousy?

I know, that by the title, you think that I'm jealous. To start, I'm not the jealous type. It happens rarely to me. But I like Colin. Not as desperate as love, but enough to get jealous and think badly. There's this girl in our class (I'll be nice; let's call her Mary) that Colin sits next to. Mary and I were pretty good friends at the begining of the year, but not so good any more. It's not that we don't like each other; no, Mary's nice. But we're not as good of friends. It doesn't matter. Anyway, Colin sits next to her in home room and science. She only has 3 classes with us. She wasn't brilliant enough to make it in our math class, the most advance one in the school. You practicly have to sell your grandma to get in. If you score 99% or higher on the math placement test, you're in. So that's one thing I trumph her in. And that's it. She's got an A+ average in science (well, I do too), and a higher grade in social studies. Mary skipped a grade just to add to it. She's amazing in language arts (Colin, Mary and I share the ELA class). AND she's in jazz band. ARRRRR! But that's not the only reason that I think I'm jealous. Mary seems to be able to get in the smarter kids croud prety well (as in Colin, my two other friends and I. We're in all the enriched classes. The highest you can get. We are some of the smartest kids in the entire building). So Mary gets to be with Colin as much as she wants. REPEAT: ARRRRRRRR!. I good now. Sorry. Where was I? Oh yes: ANOTHER reason that I think that I'm jealous. This is probably the biggest reason: Mary can get Colin to laugh. Ohhhh, how I try to get that boy to laugh. This may be an example of how much I like him, but I think that his laugh is like the best sound that I can hear. For me, I try so very hard to get Colin to laugh (partly for my own enjoyment). It rarely works. But when it does...something happens. After we both stop lauging, our eyes lock. Our cheeks get bright red. Then we turn away. I love it. Anyway, Mary can just get him to laugh willy nilly. It kills me. I wish that I had that ability. But I feel as if it's not the same laugh; the after action deffinatly doesn't happen. I know what you're thinking: Mary being drop-dead gorgeous is this pathetic girl's last reason of jealousy. Nope. Mary cut her hair short; too short. She had a boy's cut. Everyone loves how different she is! She speaks her mind, total veggie, and an eco-maniac. That's my last reason of jealousy: she get's great thoughts. Then again, thre's nothing that I can do about that. I just hope that Colin doesn't cave in and give her a ton of attention too. I can't get my hopes up that he likes me, but if there's a number-2 wish, it would be that he doen't trump her over me.

Colin and Teasing

Ok, so it's been a few weeks since I've last posted. I'll say no more on that topic. I've already apologized in my last post. Which, conveniently, was a couple weeks ago. Anyway, I figured that since Colin asked me out who-knows how long ago (it feels like it's been months), everything was done. Nothing's happened since then. No dates or even mentions. Of course, our class (along with some other people) still tease us. It's kinda funny because at the begining of the year, most of the teasing seemed to be angled twoard me. I did the worst thing possible: I reacted to them. But I got over it. So now, even though the teasing hasn't stopped (acctualy, I think that it's gotten worse), I'm fine with it. Yeah, I still react to it sometimes, but not as badly. Colin does though. He gets super mad. Sometimes it results into fake slaps and things. I find it funny though. He reacts to it in a humorous manar to me. Colin turns bright magenta, and I think that it makes me feel good. Like he actualy has as big a crush on me as I do on him. I don't get my hopes up though.

My Bad

OK, so if you're a dedicated reader (which, judging by the big fat 0 in my comments list, I don't have any readers)you have probably noticed that I haven't been posting lately. One word: BUSY. I've been so busy lately, it's like the past two weeks have sorta flown by! I dance on Fridays and Thursdays (so cross out those two possible blogging days), I had OAT testing on Wendsday and Friday (so cross out Wendsday and Friday again)Monday I was loaded with HW (sigh,cross out Monday). It's now Saturday and Sunday hasn't come yet. The week before that everyone was busying themselves preparing for the OATs (AKA giving a ton of HW), and so I haven't had much free time to post. So I should say, my bad.

1-800-I-Need-Answers!!!!!!

Now I'm sooooo much more confused than I was a few days ago. And I didn't think that it was even possible! First off, since it's the weekend, there's no one taunting, teasing or mocking me about my so-called "guy". But that's usual. But the dust has seemed to have settled down a bit. The only thing that is irregular about this particular weekend is my mom. She learned that Colin asked me out Thursday night and ever since then has been slipping things in about him. Like, on Friday, She asked if we had any plans for the weekend, such as play dates, sleepovers, or (turning toward me) dates? Yeah, I know. And speaking of Colin, I don't know what to call him! He asked me out, and isn't that supposed to mean that we go out somewhere? Because so far, not a word has been spoken to me as a possible date. I've been trying to think of good places where 2 eleven-year-olds can go out together (BONUS: go out together alone). So tell me, precious reader, what do you think about these? Keep in mind that this is my first date and (more than likely) Colin's first date too: a walk in the park, a movie, he comes over here for pizza and a movie, or maybe even bowling. But I can't think where a good date could be. So unless or until he does, we're just presuming that we're going out.

The Drama Settles Down?

Remember my last post, the one I did yesterday? My life involved a ton of drama yesterday; I personaly thought that this ment that my life would no longer be quite as normal. Word was already starting to spread about the two of us (although so far, no talk of even a date has been shot my way) and it's going around fast. Colin seemed to even treat me differently; you know, like with a little more respect (aka, no more disses tossed between us or harsh words thrown at each other) and [maybe] a little more like a female friend. Anyway, I figured that the class would figure it out sometime, but so far they haven't even let on. It was as if my world was back to the way it was; me, a funny, spunky guy-less girl with friends who are nagging her about Colin. So to add to my list of questions about the highly complicated lifestyle of a confused school girl: Is the drama gone? Or is it just begining?

My Big Fat Complicated Guy Problem

Where did I leave off? Oh yes: the complications. So I was still little miss Happy-go-lucky because of Colin's previous offer. But I was shot back into real world right after lunch, when a guy was nagging Colin about if he asked me out, and if he owed him money. So...Colin was paid to ask me out? Did that mean that he didn't like me? Then again, Colin kept trying to avoid the topic... Did that mean that Colin acctualy cared about me? Ahhh! I don't know what to do. Do I take him seriously and start acting like BF and GF?Or should I back off and wait until he possibly breaks up with me in order to refrain from getting hurt. I feel so lost with him sometimes.

A Big Guy Problem

Ok, it was just today that I started this blog but already my life has given me a good sample of drama that fits right in with the blog. Let's see, where to begin, where to begin... Oh, yes. Since around the middle of this year, I've had a crush on a guy in my class. Although he can be annoying, everyone says that it's because he has a crush on me. Everyone in my class says that we would make a great couple, but neither Colin (the guy) nor I have gotten the guts to ask the other out. So yesterday, at recess, my friends and his friends tried really, really, really, hard to get him to ask me out. Although it was absolutly histaricle for me, it got really akward for both of us. Then someone started the rumor that we were going out! After that, Colin stopped talking to me. So I appologized to him, and hoped for better the next day.
Well, I guess that you could call today better. When we were waiting for our first class to begin, I was reading. I put down the book to go and see if he was still mad at me from the day before, but when I turned around, Colin was standing there. I gasped, ever so softly, and wondered if he was there to foregive me. Heck, no! Acctualy, what he said shocked me. what happened to the stubborn mule who refused to ask me out yesterday? Anyway, He looked me strait in the eye and asked me "Do you wanna go out with me?" Naturaly, I was stunned; for God's sake, this was the first person ever to ask me out! But my automatic response was "sure. I like that!". So for the first time in my eleven years, I was no longer single! But then things got-um-complicated...

Welcome to a Funny, Spunky blog!

To start off: WOW! Congratulations on finding this blog! I didn't expect anyone to find this. So I must warn you, great and powerful reader: this blog reveals a ton of sensitive and sorta personal stuff. Nothing dangerous; just in the wrong hands (e.g., a school blabber, big mouth, gossip spreader; you get the point), the info in this blog could potentially kill what ever amount of social life I have. And if that happens, God knows, I will hunt you down and send you in a box to the mighty rain forests of Chile. So I wouldn't go blabbing 'bout this, if I were you. Anyhoo, I guarantee that this blog will do at least one of the following: make you laugh (if you already have, great!), cry, wonder, imagine (either of what this compares to in your life or of what it's like to be me) and/or just stare at the computer screen. Just keep reading for more of the drama, fun, and confusion in my life!